But as for me, my feet had almost slipped; I had nearly lost my foothold. For I envied the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. Psalm 73:2-3 (NIV)
I had the wrong perspective. I was looking at life from the wrong point of view. How so? I envied prosperity. I wanted great wealth. I looked around and compared myself with others. I wanted what I did not have. I was discontent. I was unsatisfied. I chased after riches. I pursued worldly wealth. No matter how much I had, it was never enough. I always wanted more. My heart and mind and life were consumed with desire for the things of this world. I suspected that others were living a far better life, filled with greater comfort and pleasure. I was wrong. I was stupid. I was ignorant. I was sadly misinformed. My hopes and dreams and values were all wrong. I was on a path that was headed nowhere. Why is that? I was on a slippery path walking away from you.
I have come to my senses. I have seen the error of my ways. Tell me more about that. I now know that the riches of this life are fleeting. I now know that worldly riches will not satisfy. I now know that acquiring all the wealth of this world would not leave me at peace and fill me with contentment. I would always want more. Yes, you would. I suspect that the desire for more is not all bad. I have come to believe that you have placed a desire in my heart and mind and life for something else, something different, something far better and more. What is that desire that is in you? It is my desire to know and love you. It is my desire to be rich in my relationship with you. What would a rich relationship with me look like? I want to hear your voice. I want to receive your counsel. I want to be guided by you. How will that happen? I will draw near to you. I will worship you with all that is within me. I want to live in a close and intimate relationship with you. To know you… To walk in your ways… To follow you… To go and do your will… To bear fruit for your kingdom and bring glory to your name… That is what a rich relationship with you would look like. That is what I want. That is what I will pursue. I want to live my life with and for you. My heart is filled with desire to know you and live this kind of life. I will fulfill that desire within you.
Lord, I will not envy those who have gained great worldly wealth. I do not want to live a prideful, arrogant and wicked life. I do not want to be rich in worldly wealth. I want to be rich in my relationship with you. I want to be able to tell others of your goodness. Amen
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